...And We're Back

What a difference a day (or 5 years) makes. When the PCT closed for the first time ever due to the pandemic, Gabe was out there. He was out on the trail, chasing his dreams and they all came to a crashing halt. He wanted to stay, but resupply options were limited and there was this curfew thing.......so he had to go.

It all seems like a bit of a blur, 5 years later, but I do know this. I told Gabe, come home, finish college, and I will get you back out on that trail, if its the last thing I do. You have my word. And he did. With his head held low, and the stench of disappointment all around him, he came home. It was the pandemic, so, we were all hiding out somewhere safe. Somewhere away from the crowds, away from the infected. I was making homemade bread, we were binging Netflix. Lubbock, Roswell, Wilburton, Amarillo......the less people the better...and holy cow did I learn to make a mean loaf of bread. But there was this lingering disappointment, this lingering let down, a sadness that we could all feel, we ALL felt it. Felt it for him, for ourselves - because we were all dreaming through him. Every single one of us. As terrified as I was to see him walk away, to "watch Gabe walk" - I was proud and hopeful and excited. I told Gabe, finish college and I will get you back on that trail, and that is just what he did. Four grueling years, and this kid here is a mechanical engineer, with a degree from Embry Riddle Aeronautical University. He did it, he kept his word, now I keep mine.

So here we sit, in San Diego, California...waiting for his permit date. But things are a little different this time. There's no pandemic. He is older, wiser, more fit, and above all, I would like to believe that his prefrontal cortex is more developed, he is able to make those decisions that will ensure that he comes back home to us. There is life experience on board, there are additional camping trips, there are hikes under his belt, there are 5 years of experiencing adversity, on his own, that he didn't have before. And there's a girl. Gabe isn't going it alone this time. He has this beautiful, feisty, fit, strong, smart young lady who has decided to tackle this with him. Enter Isabella Jade...his partner for the past 4 years, someone who has seen his dreams and his passion and decided to join - not just for him, but for her own growth too. My hope lies in the fact that females seem to take less risks. He is not 19 and alone this time. He is 24 with a college degree and a smart companion who is not shy about sharing her opinion....someone who will say, with authority....NO GABE, it is not safe to cross that creek right here...NO GABE, we cannot pass that rattlesnake, we need to wait...NO GABE that water isn't even safe to drink....pull your head out of your ass, sir.

So here we sit, in San Diego, waiting for his start date of April 11. Everything has changed and nothing has changed at all. The pandemic is over, he finished college, he has a trail companion who loves him dearly. But he's still my little boy, about to be out walking through the desert without me. He's still my perfect little boy, who needed me to kiss his ouchies and tell his teachers to leave him the F alone, he is still my perfect little boy who couldn't wait for me to pick him up at daycare, who needed a ride to 7 million hockey games...he is still my perfect little boy.